This morning was the launch of the last scheduled night shuttle launch. It was so beautiful; it lit up the sky in layers of beautiful oranges and yellows, framed in the dark and navy blues of the night. As the shuttle curved up into space, it looked like a flaming arrow, shot up into the heavens and, as it faded away into our atmosphere, the stars followed. A mere two minutes after launch and the shuttle was just one more brilliant star in a sky full of them.

A miracle being abolished by a cruel President.



...if only my camera worked...

...and it is summed up in 4 great words:

Dr.

Horrible's

Sing-Along

Blog.



PURE AWESOMESAUSE JOY!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today my dad is taking my cat (Gyspy,an elderly main coon) and my sister's cat (Callie, a seasoned pastel calico) to the Animal Shelter. Its a 'humane' one, which supposedly takes care of elderly cats until they pass. In a way, I feel like I'm betraying her, not being there in her last days or at least being there when he drops them off...but I just can't. I can't do it.

I was seven when I got Gyspy. I had always wanted a cat, so, for my birthday, my parents said it was alright. A friend of my mom's told her about a cat that needed a good home, since the owners were moving. We found the newspaper ad with the phone number and gave them a call. They told us to come and get the cat. The only problem was that, by time we got there, a few days had passed and they had already moved. They left a message on our machine to go and see one of their neighbors, who was going to watch the cat until we got there. Except, the neighbors didn't want to deal with the hassle of cat-watching, so they had put her in a local shelter. They gave us the shelter's name and address and we called, asking if they still had the cat and if they would hold her until we could get to them. They did and would, thankfully!!! When we got to the shelter, we were led to the back where she was in one of the vertical cages. Gyspy was sitting in the very back, nestled in her litter box, with her back to the world, pretty much as unfriendly as can be. Next to her cage was an adorable kitten who kept playing with my hair (I had long hair back then), shirt sleeve, and fingers. I asked to hold Gyspy, who wasn't unfriendly about it, but wasn't thrilled either. My mom asked if I really wanted this cat and offered to get me the kitten instead. I looked up at her and said "We've chased this cat around the county for five days...I'm taking her home with us!" Mom laughed at that.

When we got Gyspy, her name was "Barney" (like the dinosaur or Fred Flintstone's neighbor). I renamed her "Gypsy" like the traveling folk because of how much we went through to get her, except I couldn't spell it right at the time. So, the mis-spelled name stuck. It really didn't matter...it wasn't like the cat was going to be writing letters and signing her name or anything. We knew who she was and we loved her.

We acquired Callie the same way any family with two children acquires multiple animals: the younger sibling wants to have what the older one has. Callie was bought at a more local shelter and has been a joy in our lives. She has this funny thing she does...if you scratch behind her ears, over her head, and down her back to the base of her tail, she does this funny "tip-toe" dance, where she kneads her paws and raises up on her toes.


Both cats are pretty old. I mean, we've had Gyspy for over thirteen years, and she was already a full-grown cat when we got her. Callie isn't that far behind Gyspy in age. Their health is declining rapidly. They've had to be confined to a bathroom for the three last months because they are no longer using the litter box, are shedding at an unusual rate, scratching until they leave flecks of blood, and are producing an unusual amount of oil and dander. The scratching has gone away (it was due to a summer flea issue we've been tackling), as well as they shedding and the blood. But they've lost so much weight and Gyspy's fur (while use to be balding in patches) isn't growing in as it once was. My dad said that he went though the same thing with his cat J.B., which turned out to be Feline Leukemia. He paid for all the treatments back then, but the truth of the matter is that all the treatments do is try to make the cat as comfortable as possible until it dies. He suffered along with J.B. for a long, heart-breaking and agonizing months until his cat passed, saddened that he didn't take the initiative to end J.B.'s suffering sooner.

The sad truth is that we can't afford to pay for any of the treatments for Gyspy or Callie. We're barely making the house payments from two months ago, trying to get the money in before the next month's bill comes. So my dad is taking it on himself to take the cats to a "retirement" shelter. He says the shelter is a humane, non-kill one that takes care of elderly pets, but I have no idea if this is true or if he's just trying to make us all feel better. I really want to believe him...

We're going to give the cats a bath today, brush them, give them extra treats, and just spend some quality time with them before he takes them away. I'm a total wreck. Its not like its a surprise or anything, we've been talking about this plan for two months now. But...its just hard to say goodbye. Especially since they're still so active. They haven't hit the really hard stages yet, so they're still full of life, and it makes it even harder to know that I'm never going to see them again in my lifetime.

Gyspy can't meow, but she can purr really loudly and she has this funny little thing she likes to do when you hold her...she sits up on your chest, wraps both paws around your neck and rubs her head under your chin. Its so adorable and I tear up every time. I have no doubt in my mind that she loves me and I love her back so very, very much.

I'm going to miss them both.

Gyspy, Calle; I love you. Thank you for being a part of our lives. May God bless you and keep you in his arms until I can once day see you again in Heaven.

In case anyone is reading this...or I'm just talking to the wind and want to remember later...


I'm quitting the Internet.


I have a lot of things to think about in my life right now...so I don't know when I'm gonna be back, if at all.

Its just that I have a lot going on in my life and...well, frankly, aside from a few (sadly, very, very, VERY few) people, the internet is just saturated with brainless and nasty folk who seem to derive pleasure from trashing and destroying other people and other things...

I, thankfully, have not been the point of attack from any of these sort, but it seems like I can't move my mouse without running into a website dedicated to being vindictive towards something/someone or a person virtually shouting out against something mild and rallying others to be against it too.





...I'm just tired, that's all.

It doesn't matter if you're depressed, empty, or alone inside...as long as you look pretty on the outside, right?



Open me up
Inside
I am an empty, hollow, terrible thing.



I'm going to rot away and no one is going to know the difference.



I am a terrible person who does not deserve anything.



I am self-destructive.




Don't you think that, if I knew how to handle it, I would done so already?
Don't get angry at me when I don't know what I want you to do or say.
I don't want you to do or say anything!



I have one parent scolding me to save all my money for car insurance and school and the other asking for every and any bit of money I can spare out of my tiny part-time pay check because we have virtually no income.




My world is a 10x15 jail cell.

Looks like that chased off the stalk-toshers.

I don't mind people reading, but if you never post a comment or send a message and "add to friend" once a month, REPEATEDLY, it is just creepy. One user in particular is just a creep.

Anyways...November.

Hello.

If you are wondering what happened to October, it was filled with a lot of work, sweat and 2-3rd degree burns. My leg still hasn't healed all the way yet, but its close. I have a kick-@$$ immune system, so I only get sick once a year (if at all) and any injuries heal pretty quickly. If you are looking for pictures, check: http://macystudio.deviantart.com/

Images will be posted shortly.

Currently, I'm working on crochet projects for Christmas gifts. The list (since none of these people know about this journal, its ok to post) includes:

AJ--ninja poster and a box that will include a mini-ninja hidden amongst peas (its an inside joke).
Dragon--Alice's hookah-smoking Caterpillar.
Turtle--a RockStar gutar
Anna--a character hat.


I am also working on a blanket based off of "The Mentalist" character, Red John. I'll post an image link when its done.

Until then,
L8r.

I have found that I am a scientist, not a field agent, when it comes to Horror films. I like to look at something and take it apart, study it, and then see if I can put it back together...not be in the middle of it, experiencing it.


This page is sort of like what I mean: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1082868/faq#.2.1.2

I like to pin down the particulars, the details...I like to KNOW it, through and throughout.

I saved a Gecko.

And found the fur for my "Puss in Boots" costume (Halloween @ the Library).

But most importantly, I saved a Gecko and released it from our house into the front walk.

Yay

^________^

Every year, I get really excited about my birthday for the two-week countdown. I'm like a little kid; I just can't wait. And then, usually one or two days just before my actual birthday, I get extremely depressed. I remember that I have no real friends...no one who will remember my birthday on time (aside from my immediate family)...and no one to celebrate anything with. My mom still makes me a cake (its tradition. Ever since I was a little kid, my mom always made me an awesome themed cake for my birthday) but no one really cares about it. I receive no presents. I sometimes receive a check in the mail a week or three later from a grandparent. But there are no phone calls wishing me a "happy birthday", no gifts wrapped in paper with a nice surprise inside, nothing. If I want anything at all for my birthday, I have to buy it for myself. Last year, I had a friend call me on my birthday...only to talk for two hours about herself and some new celebrity crush she had. I finally lied and said I had to get off the phone. She hung up without mentioning ONCE anything about me, asking me any questions, or even seeing how I was doing. I could have been a dial tone for all she cared...and she was the only one who called.



I am so freakin' depressed right now...



Yesterday, I was hit pretty badly by my depression while I was at work. Luckily, no one caught me crying and I was able to suppress most of the outward signs by time I had to work at the service desk again. I don't know if I suppressed it really well or it was just that no one noticed. It could very easily be the latter. When I got home, I just went to bed and slept from six-thirty until nearly ten this morning. I didn't want to eat, I didn't want to watch tv or listen to music, I didn't want to do anything except go to sleep...and never wake up again.

I'm not talking about committing suicide here, I'm just talking about it literally. I did not want to wake up again. I was just so tired of dealing with everything and everyone that all I wanted to do was just sleep. Forever.

Of course, I woke up to an empty house this morning, so spending the morning by myself was rather enjoyable. I was able to catch up on all the internet comings and goings that I had missed out while I was unplugged (I spent last week moving my room around). Unfortunately, that peace ended at eleven-thirty, when my dad and sister came home. They just leave all the groceries and bags of stuff lying around, so I'm the one who has to clean everything up (and I had just sat down to eat my brunch...which was then cold by time I got back to it).



Shite'rs.



But, whatever. You know, I just don't care anymore. I really just don't. I have today off, so I'm just going to keep to myself and try to enjoy it. I'll be going to Disney (I wont say which park) for my birthday, so that will be both fun and depressing (as I have no friends to go with me). Happy Birthday to me...



That was the 'crap' portion of this journal. So here is the 'junk' bit.


I have noticed that there are some people who like to "friend" me. In fact, one person keeps friending me repeatedly. I will not say your name, but every time I get the notice that says "_____ has added you to their friends list!", I have sent you a private message. Well, as you have yet to answer a single one of the last three or four messages, I am sending an ultimatum here. This is for you and anyone else who has added me to their "friends" list:



If I do not receive a comment or a personal message from you, telling me who you are or at least why you added me to your list, I will put a block on anyone trying to friend me and I will set each and every one of my journals (both past and future) on the highest "private" setting.


By putting on the private setting, it will block everyone, even friends, from reading what I have written. I don't mind people reading...what I mind is knowing that there are people who like to read, but not identify themselves or why they are reading my works. That is creepy.



And I do not like creeps.



So, there you have it. an ultimatum to everyone who reads my journal.
Send me a comment or a message...
Or prepare to take me off your list.

Seriously...this really honks me off.

Back when Nick first started (1977) it ran live action shows like "Hey Dude!" and "Dare Devil/Double-Dare Devil/Family Dare Devil" and "Pete and Pete"...you know, back when there was actual thought and acting put into the shows. Cartoons weren't shown until 1991, and that was ok. Nick had started the trend of 7-15 yr. old demographic shows and they were ready for something new to wow the group. Hence, cartoons. But not just any cartoons; cartoons that ran the spectrum. We had cartoons for everyone and broke the industry with new trends: gross cartoons ("Ren and Stimpy"), family cartoons ("Rugrats"), relaxed sitcoms ("Angry Beavers")...do you understand where I'm going with this? Nick started the trend of cartoons.

Nick wasn't the only ground breaker for cartoons. The appropriately named Cartoon Network ran cartoons day in and day out. "Looney Toons" started there, "Tom and Jerry" started there. So many cartoons started there. I remember watching "Johnny Quest" (both the original show and then, later on, the updated teen version) all the way up to "I am Weasel"...heck, I was watching all the way up to a month ago! That is roughly 21 years of watching and supporting both networks. These networks made me interested in art and kept me drawing and doodling every day of my life. These networks were the reason I wanted to become an animator.


So why am I now pretty much boycotting both networks?


They are taking away the cartoons, killing them off without a word.



Nick has started returning to live action shows, which is fine with me. My issue with Nick is
that they are taking away good shows that have ran well and long without a reason or warning. The fact that the shows are being taken away to make room for new things is nothing new, but the fact that there is no warning when they are removed makes things frustrating. You may argue that the removed shows are being run on the Bright House ch134 (or whatever the channel is) sister channel to Nick. That is only partly true; not all removed shows are being run there. On top of that, not everyone can afford the "extended channels" package, which makes it frustrating to know that certain missed shows are so close and yet so out of reach.

Now, Nick is only slightly excusable. They remove their shows without warning, which is frustrating, but the reason they are being removed is understandable.


Cartoon Network, however, is the real pisser.


Cartoon Network is also removing their good and long running cartoons to make way for new things. Once again, that is just the natural order. And, at least, they have the good taste to warn users with a "Final Episode" notice and, sometimes, a whole marathon (such as when "Fosters" was ended. It was advertised two weeks ahead and the final episode was presented in a ten-episode mini-marathon). So, at least they're good about taking shows away. The only problem is that the shows they replace them with is pretty much crap. There is no real humor, no real thought and the only interesting thing about them is the new art styles. And, worse of all, a good portion of the replacement cartoons are all imported dubbed crap that has the same characters and story/plots with minor tweaks to be "new". Yes, I am not an Anime fan. I prefer to support American-created cartoons and cartoonists.By importing Anime, they are running American cartoonists out of a job and closing the door to new/fresh cartoons.


You may ask "So, how is CN killing cartoons then? They're replacing them with new toons, right?"


Wrong.

Two little words: CN Real.

They are putting live action shows onto a network that was CREATED FOR CARTOONS!!

That is like running wrestling on SciFi...although, as wrestling is fake, they could argue that it is part of the fantasy (joking here, people!)...Seriously, though. They are running shows like "Destroy Build Destroy" and "The Outsiders", they are taking away from the cartoons. And while some of the shows are creative enough to be slightly helpful for teens, for the most part, its more mindless "reality" show garbage. How is this going to help anyone? How is it interesting? We are watching people get paid to show off, hurt and plot against one another, and inevitably fail, usually in a humiliating or painful fashion. The "winners" are given money, but only a little more than the losers, and everyone gets their 15 minutes of fame which will be used to get their foot in the Hollywood door to create more ridiculous "reality" shows.


WHY?!

WHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHY?!?!?!

WHY ARE WE ALLOWING THIS CRAP TO BE ON TV AS ENTERTAINMENT?!

Cartoon Network and Nick are killing cartoons.

I will no long be watching Cartoon Network.

I will watch Nick until they get rid of "Spongebob" and "Fairy Odd Parents". At that point, I will know for certain that Nick has made the same decision as Cartoon Network (ie: killed the cartoons).

I watched these networks all my life. They made me smile, laugh and cry. They inspired me to become a cartoonist, a dream that I will achieve in order to bring some GOOD cartoons back to the worlds and, perhaps, these networks.

I only pray that future viewers of televised cartoons will know what good cartoons actually are by then.

Today I saved an Earthworm.

Lately, as per usual Summer weather, we have been having awesome thunder storms. There is one rocking the waves right now with a spectacular display of lightning, but nothing can compare to the storm Friday night!!!

The lightning ripped across the sky like nothing I have seen in a long while. Since my bedroom window faces the north-easterly area, I had a great view of things. I grabbed my video camera, but it's night filming has much to be desired. If I figure out how to clean up the video, I may post a few clips later.

Thankfully, no one has been reported as being struck by lighting since the last attack (what was that, two weeks now? Three?), which makes the storms that much more enjoyable. Its hard to watch the storms, knowing that someone got hurt. Although, with the number of people who like to stand on the docks and watch the lighting over the ocean, I'm actually surprised how low the number of lighting strike attacks currently is!

While I could rant and rail all day long on (and against) the subject of the modern horror film genre, I have a sad confession: I would be a good writer for a modern horror film.

I have a knack (I hesitate to say the word "cursed") for twisted ideas.

The problem is my overactive imagination.

It is the reason I do not--I cannot---watch horror films. I can look at any ordinary situation and I can make up both "good ending" and "bad ending" scenarios immediately, almost against my will. For example, as I was driving down the road one day, I saw a mini-van pulled off to the side of the road. Well, it was half off and half on, sticking out slightly on the highway. The woman driver was on the phone, facing the road with her back to the van. This is how my mind ran the scene, keeping in mind that #1 is the bad ending and #2 is the good ending:


1) Woman is having a heated conversation with the roadside assistant, eventually getting a tow truck to come and help her, but she is now five hours late and behind on everything, setting off a chain of events that make the rest of her day (perhaps her week) a a living nightmare. Things get so bad at work and at home that, at the end of the week, she goes home (driving in the rain, swerving to avoid hitting another car), collects the pile of overdue bills, listens to the messages on her answering machine (nothing pleasant, think nagging "you're not worth the work I put into you" mother and cheating boyfriend dumping her) and kills herself in her room, sitting on the edge of her bed and swallows a bullet (actually, this phrase is a misdemeanor as the bullet goes up through the roof of the mouth and into the skull, exploding out the back of the head in a spray of blood, brain, tissue, and bone, scattering and splattering the mess against the green walls).

or

2) Someone pulls over and helps the woman, gaining a "thank you" lunch and a new friendship.



My mom, who I was taking to work, then commented, "Gee, I hope her kids aren't late for school..." which then made everything worse in my mind. Originally, the bad ending was merely a lousy week and a sudden end. Now, it ran like this:



1) Woman is having a heated conversation with the roadside assistant when a speeding truck runs off the road, slamming into the mini-van and, in a cinematic chain of flipping, rolling and the sounds of metal on metal, both vehicles are destroyed, with one gas tank possibly catching on fire. The woman is unharmed, but now has just watched the twisted death of her children.




...see? This is why I cannot watch films like "Saw" or "Final Destination". My mind doesn't just come up with ideas, it displays them in full color and surround sound that is of IMAX quality. Back in high school, I read "Misery" by S. King and them spent the rest of the week looking over my shoulder, waiting for a crazed woman to jump out at me (if you don't know what I'm talking about, re-read the book, especially the ending). I have issues with public restrooms, not because the health is questionable, but because every time I poke open the stall door I expect to see a dead body waiting for me. When I eventually confirm that I'm not about to discover the deceased in one of the adjoining stalls, I'm heart-stoppingly sure that something will try and attack me while I'm using the small stall, either a random killer or a demon/zombie/beast-thing ("Silent Hill" meets SciFi is never good) is about to start rattling the walls and reaching under/out for me, to drag me off by my ankles and hack me into pieces. If a bathroom is ill-lit, I'll back out immediately.

I know this isn't a product of my environment (both parents have created a loving, safe and warm home for myself) nor is it a part of my depression (which, for the record, I would like to say that I have gone nearly two months now without a day of deep depression), but merely a product of my creativity and imagination tapping into the darker aspect of human nature. Unfortunately, I cannot turn it off, curb it, or suppress it, but merely attempt to redirect my thoughts and limit its ability to run rampant in my mind.



Interestingly enough, I enjoy shows such as "Bones", "NCIS" and "CSI", not just because of decent character interaction and (sometimes) good writing, but because it limits these dark script-like thoughts. Instead of focusing on the death, I naturally focus on the way the shows are put together, the actors and the way the camera angles. This natural desire to know how it works and flows together overrides (or, if you prefer "beats down") the darker ideas.


If anyone is actually reading this, please please PLEASE don't think that I'm some crazy creeper waiting for the right moment to explode in a killing spree. My imagination isn't always darker thoughts, mostly its random Seuss-and-Henson creativity of imaginative creatures and doodles and little bits and pieces of stories and/or plots. I am really a nice and friendly person, always looking to be helpful and kind to other people (I'm a type B/ introvert personality)...I just scare myself sometimes.

Picked up my pre-ordered copy of "Coraline" today. The guy told me that it was a good thing I pre-ordered my copy because every single copy the store could get their hands on was pre-ordered. They had NOTHING to stock on the shelves!!! The special 2-disc version was worth the money. Plus, I got a really cool (free) tote bag!!! Its made of good material and has the catchphrase and buttons painted with glow-in-the-dark paint and everything!

M&Ms have now put out a "limited time" set of M&Ms that have coconut in them. I LOVE them!!! The really good thing about them is that, in order to keep the coconut flavor fresh (you adjust really quickly to the new flavor) you have to eat them slowly. Have one, then wait a few minutes. In doing this, you don't get use to the coconut flavor, so every time you have one, you are fully enjoying the mix of flavor. Now, if only they'd put out a cherry one...


There are some things in life that makes me happy. Not "smile on my face, I'm entertained for a minute, but it'll wear off soon enough" sort of happy...I mean, really happy. As in "actual joy, keep smiling all day on the sheer memory of the experience of it" sort of happy. And the best part is that its always the simplest of things that does it. For example:

- seeing a puppet (bonus points if it is being used, double bonus points if it is a full-body puppet and is being used).

- hearing small bells ring.

- playing with a tassel.

- shredding paper with an office shredder.

- jugglers and/or clowns...well, circus and/or cirque related people in general.

- watching "CATS".

- rain (bonus if I'm able to see it, double bonus if I can experience it)


Last week, the library where I work hosted the Jiggleman (he's famous for his performances, as in "Late Night with ___" famous) for our Summer kids program. Now, this was his 5th time performing at the library (apparently we have a pretty good deal going on with him). Every single time he has performed with us, I scheduled to work a full shift. I hate it. So, this time, I was able to sneak away for a few minutes here and there to get a glimpse of his performance (thankfully, I have a pretty cool boss who understands). I only saw about 10 or 15 minutes collectively, but it was enough to make me laugh and clap like a 5-year old and smile for the rest of the day.

I guess my point is never grow up.
Always enjoy the little and simple things in life.

Cry freely.

Laugh freely.

Don't be wasting your time worrying if the people around you think you're an idiot because you're cheering and laughing and crying and clapping...all that matters is if you are truly making the most of the moment, really living and experiencing it.


...of course, I'm not saying its ok to be obnoxious or rude and encroach on other people's enjoyment of that same moment. Don't thrash your arms around and accidentally knock someone unconscious.

Just...enjoy.

Despite all odds and initial comments, Mr. Squarepants is now 10 years old.


Happy Birthday, man.

So, yeah....


Summer.


That time where I'm 85% free to do whatever I want (excluding the hours in which I work) and I do nothing at all. For some reason, when I have an abundance of free time, all I can do is look at my list of "Things I need to and want to get done" and just say "meh".

Weird paradox.


When I don't have the time, I manage to get it all done, but when I do have the time, I flake.


Like I said, weird.

Ummmmmmmmmmm...what else can be said?

Oh!!

I've noticed that some people have added me to their friend's list. If you do, please send me a PM or comment somewhere or whatever to let me know (1) how you found me and (2) if I know you in real life. If the answer to #2 is "no", then I need you to answer (3) why on earth you find me interesting enough to want to be my "friend" and read my journals.

Its not like I have anything really important here. I'm not looking to validate my existence by adding one or two hundred strangers to my "friends" list in order to tell myself that I'm important. I don't even think that what I type is very interesting, its just something to do...

But, hey, you know, its cool.

If you're looking for some mad rants at a particular person or thing, those will be very rare.

If you're looking for some angst- or emo-filled entries about my depression, those will also be pretty rare. I've actually been doing pretty well these past weeks.

If you're looking for me to add you as a "friend" just because you added me, you can probably forget it. I don't see the point of reading other people's journals unless you're an actual friend of mine (someone that I either know from real life or someone I talk to on a consistent basis online) or its a journal for a club that I'm into.

Besides, doesn't being a "friend" mean that two people are conversing? What's the point of friending someone if you've never even talked to them (ie: I'm noticing a distinct lack of comments on any of my posts)? Unless you're friending just so you can receive updates for when they post something new...and even then, if you like reading what they're posting, why not say something?


...meh.

If ANYone is actually reading this, have a good afternoon (or whatever time it is where you are).

This morning I saw "Up", the latest Disny-Pixar movie. It was good, with the usual high standard of Pixar and a touch of Disney's classic slow-paced story. This would be a good movie to buy and watch on a lazy Sunday afternoon with the rest of the family. Needless to say, I enjoyed it greatly.

But this is not what the title talks about.

As it usually happens for me, the closest local theater stopped showing it on the day I am finally free to go and see a movie. So I had to go way out, close to the interstate, to go and see the film. Luckily, it was $5/person night, so it was actually cheaper to go there than my local theater.

I have mixed feelings about "X-Men Origins: Wolverine". For the pro.s; H.Jackman did a marvelous job reprising his role as Logan/Wolverine. The story was pretty interesting, despite the fact that they have changed a LOT of it from what the comics (namely, the obviously inspiring, self-titled "Origins")have on record, yet I can see why they made the changes that they did. The build of the characters' inter-relationship between James/Logan and Victor as pretty key to the plot and was done fairly well. I wish they had expanded the introduction sequence a little more. If you have not read "Origins", you probably was a little confused as to who everyone was and what the whole setting/scene was about. Luckily, I own the series in book form. I recommend taking a look at it. Be forewarned: the movie changes everything except the beginning of the comic's series.

That being said, I really enjoyed the run of sequences that took place during the opening credits. Very, very, very well done!!!

The constant and (practically) trade-marked "Wolverine's angry yell at the sky" howl of rage was a bit ridiculous when done by the child actor...it was as if they were trying to sell the audience on the fact that this sick pansy kid was really going to grow up to be Wolverine. It came across as cheezy, but that's just my opinion.

I really loved the scene where Logan interacts with the elderly farm couple. That was a great set of sequences...especially the bit about the bathroom!!

The surprise ending #2 (after the credits) was a nice addition...Deadpool was done better than I expected. I was wondering where the trademarked black diamonds around the eyes was going to be incorporated into his overall look and I was not disappointed. They were clever about that.

The mutant cameos was a great sequence too. I managed to spot and name at least 3 or 4 and can't wait until it comes out on DVD so I can pause and figure out who everyone is.

What was odd (or maybe I just wasn't looking hard enough) was that I couldn't find Stan Lee in this one. Usually he's in every one of his "Marvel" movies (the hardest to find was "Spiderman" where he was in the crowd for only a few frames and the easiest to find was "Fantastic 4: Rise of the Silver Surfer" where he introduced himself to the wedding bouncer as Stan Lee). But, like I said, I was too wrapped up in just watching and enjoying the movie, so I probably just missed him.

After the movie, I had some time to kill, so I checked out a new comic shop...well, technically, its a relocated comic shop that I was familiar with before it moved.

I wish I hadn't.

The people there were so friendly and personable...
they had a great and happy relationship with one another...

So now I'm all depressed, because seeing that has reminded me that I have no friends. Pretty pathetic, I know...

So, I'm going to bed, with hopes of dreaming X-Men dreams that include fuzzy blue elfs and/or smexy-butt wild wolverine men.

G'nite.

So, on May 14th, I walked with the rest of my graduating class of 2009 to receive my A.A. (associates of art) degree. Everyone is making a huge deal out of it, but I can't see what the fuss is about. My life really isn't changing, since I don't have the money to move out on my own yet. For the last 16 (+/-) years, it has always been: get up, go to school, go to work, go to church, go to sleep.

That's pretty much it.

Sad, isn't it?

I have no real friends of which to speak of (none in the sense that I can really talk to, open up, share my real feelings and bare my heart/soul to...people who will want to hang out with me just to hang out with me, not because I'm already "there" or they're bored and have no one else to hang with. I ACTUALLY had one of my "friends" say to me: 'I'm bored. I've already called everyone else and they're already busy...' Ouch.) and no real mode of transportation of my own (4 working people share one car because my dad isn't pulling in enough money to buy a car to replace his old one, so everyone uses my car, which leaves me with nada). So, I get dropped off at work and at school. I am lonely as all get out some days.


...Back onto track....

I have graduated. Big whoop. I still have 2-3 more years of schooling left to do before I have my Masters degree. But I've finally settled on a career: Animation. And none of that Disney-Pixar movie animation; no, I want to work on cartoons such as the afternoon shows that Nick puts out (or use to put out) like "Angry Beavers" and "Hey Arnold", or WB's "Animaniacs" and "The Zeta Files", or even Toon Disney's line up. Heck, I'd really like to work on "Spongebob" or "The Simpsons" or even "Family Guy/American Dad"!!

Let me tell you, if I ever got to work on "Phineas and Ferb"...I would die happy. I honestly truly would.

But, you know what? I've been wanting to be an animator for a long time. And I've been wanting to shed this unsightly poundage for a long time. But you know what else? Wishing isn't gonna do it. I can wake up every morning and say "I want to be/do ______", but until I actually put out the EFFORT to do something about it, it isn't going to happen.

So, everyone who reads "The Secret", let me just say this:

I HAVE DISPROVED THE THEORY AND HAVE PROVED THAT YOU HAVE BEEN SCAMMED BY THE MAKER OF THE BOOK/MOVIE...SO STOP BEING A BUNCH OF POMPOUS JERKS AND GET OVER YOURSELVES!!

...not that I have had any bad experiences with those sort of people *koffkoff* ...

But, seriously, anyone who believes that putting out a good thought into the universe will bring you your hearts desire, without action to back up the good thought, is fooling themselves. Yes, there is a great cosmic force/balance. God made it so that we would be able to unlock the power of that which is known as "Humanity" (kindness and good will to others) and help to balance one another out. And for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction (what some people call "karma"). However, you are also forgetting that objects at rest tend to stay at rest until acted upon by force. Meaning, you can put out the good thought and you will be given the ABILITY to make it happen, but until you put some ACTION behind the thought, it isn't going to work.

I can sit in a chair and think to the universe "I want to walk" every day for the rest of my life...or I can sit in a chair and think "I want to walk" and then stand up.

Simple as that.

G'nite everybody.

Yeah.

Well, I finished off my final semester at BCC with 3 "A"s and 1 "B". I passed the math portion of the CLAST with an 318/295. WHOO-HOO!!!!!!!! So, on Thrus. I will join the rest of my graduating class and walk at 1pm. Yay. I got my A.A./Associates Degree!! Then I get to attend my sister's award dinner (she's graduating from High School) for a free dinner. Yay, I don't have to cook or spend money!!

I've been tossing around my career ideas lately...flopping back and forth between a job in film or animation. I cannot get thru a day without drawing/doodling at least ONCE...but my "burning fire-stay-up-all-night-for-days" passion is in creating costumes. I love to watch a film and then thing "How did they do that? Can I do that on a cheaper scale?" and then create it. But, I have little if no experience in that department. Dad likes to say that I have "shiny object syndrome" and its sort of true. I come up with an idea and then thing/do/talk about nothing except the idea. I'll go through days and days drawing the same costume concept over and over and over in minute and labeled detail. But, as soon as I have my next "big idea", the first project falls to the wayside soon after. Eventually, I'm just burned out on the first idea and give up. This usually happens due to a lack of action within a certain time period (anywhere from 1-2 weeks), mostly because I cannot get cooperation from anyone to help me with the parts I need help with (I hate to ask for help if I know I can do it myself...or at least attempt to do it myself first).

So, short story ending: I'm back to animation. At least I have some practice there. Plus, as long as there are children in the world, there will always be a need for cartoonists.

Well, that's my life. I recently discovered a Disney cartoon called "Phineas and Ferb" which has redeemed most of the modern-kid cartoons that are all imported anime garbage. "P&F" is really great. It is the light at the end of the tunnel for modern-kid cartoons. In the late 90s and early 2000s, we had the awesome toons such as "Pepper Ann", "Braceface", "Animaniacs", "Tiny Toons", "Freakazoid", etc...everything that was free from the strict FCC rules. I mean, they openly and honestly talked about things such as getting your first period, divorce, and growing up, as well as having great dialogue open to kids and adults alike. However, as the years went by, the trend of importing and dubbing Anime toons increased and everything seemed to be imported people with point chins and hair that defied gravity. Gag. So imagine my joy when I found "P&F" and on the DISNEY channel no less!!! A cartoon that deals with siblings that sometimes fight but have genuine love for one another, decent writing, constant music/great songs, and end the cartoon with a loving family getting together. They aren't screaming obscenities at one another, no one is trying to undercut the other, and there is no ill will anywhere (aside from Candice trying to "bust" her brothers, which, any sibling can tell you, is purely mandatory) in the show. The animation is creative, but simplistic. In short, a slice of my private bliss. If you haven't already have seen it, I would suggest taking a look. The songs are infectious and the character are upbeat and enjoyable.


...also, I ripped one of my fingernails past the quick (the fleshy part where the nail meets/is attached to the nail bed/finger. Bled a bit and I had to put a bandaid on it and then duct-tape to keep the bandaid on. What a pain.

Oh well.

L8r!